Vela Writes



Home ministry to launch Kathor Ninda App for faster reaction to any query seeking responses on National Attacks



Boasting of PM "Digital India" initiative, home ministry has decided to launch an  "Kathor Ninda" app for interacting with media and general public alike.

There have been increased number of attacks on soldiers recently; the only function they have been performing in recent times has been to react to host of queries by media representative in relation with these attacks. Media also aligns there questions as the one's which nation wants to know. So this becomes highly crucial  for the ministry and the minister, and given the fact that they have a set pattern of responding to all queries they have decided to call it a "Kathor Ninda" app.


Kathor Ninda Man Checking out the App


The exclusive feature of this app is:

All the reaction will be given in the pre-recorded voice of Home Minister.  Home minister recently visited a popular recording studio in filmcity to record the following line in 100 different tones for customized and futuristic functionality of the APP. "Hum is  _______ hamle ki kathor Ninda karte hai. Jaisa ki aap sab jaante hai ki iske peeche China/Pakistan ka haath hai, hum unki bhumika ki bhi kathor Ninda Karte hai. Iss hamle me hamare ____ sainik shaheed ho gaye. Hum iss hamle ki kathore Ninda karte hue samuche bharat varsh ko ye batana chahte hai ki humne army to koi bhi karyawahi karne ki poori azadi de di hai."

Probable Front page of the app.
Probable Front page of the app.

Opposition claimed that this was a national embarrassment to launch such an app considering this same party was seeking action, when in opposition. When we contacted home ministry about their reaction on oppositions allegation, we heard a voice "Hum iss opposition ki baat ki kathor ninda karte". Our reporter was quick to notice that it was the voice of our loving Home Minister. Another conclusion out of the same was that there are multiple lines instead of the one reported above.


May be the people in home ministry these day are busy with UAT testing of the same app.



Disclaimer: Don't confuse satires for reality.

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